Articles

Written stuff.

Saturday Morning Cartoons

Saturday morning cartoons sure have gone downhill since Crabby was a boy.

Nineties Kids

“Stop trying to cling to a niche just because you think it gives you a right to be an elitist twat on the internet who complains how good things used to be. Things got better. Except for you.”

Splatterhouse 2010 Isn’t THAT Bad

The 2010 Splatterhouse reboot gets a ton of bad press, but if you consider what it is, it’s actually not that bad.

Triple-A Gaming is Dead to Me

I used to get hype for a lot of things. I would look forward to various games and movies, anxiously awaiting their release date. But as I grew older, I stopped doing this.

Meh. FarCry 3.

FarCry 3 is a game. It exists, and that’s that.

Jew’s Internet History Part 5: A Deadly Alliance Is Accidentally Forged

Last time things were looking super hopeful, but one must ask themselves: “If everything was looking good for E&N, why the fuck is Jew on RBX?” The answer is actually pretty simple: shit got fucked up, but in a good …

Jew’s Internet History Part 4: The Real AND The Fake E&N (Sorta)

Last time we watched my hopes and dreams crumble, much like rust from the bottom of a beat ass Toyota. But the story doesn’t end there. Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain’t all sunshine and …

Crispy Chicken Sandwich

I’m sitting at a McDonald’s, and as I stare into my crispy chicken sandwich I begin to wonder just where everything went wrong.

Bullet Witch Is The Bane Of My Existence

She can’t traverse a level, kill an enemy, or locate a checkpoint, BUT SHE’S GOT A FAT ASS!

Jew’s Internet History Part 3: The Rise And Fall Of THI

Last time we learned of the creation of THI and I got all warm and fuzzy about a bunch of old friends who mostly hate me now. Now let’s watch as it all falls apart. Murphy’s Law is a cruel …

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