Punisher Week – First Impressions of the Punisher
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I will admit that I have not read all that many comic books in my day. When it comes to pop culture I am more of an anime/graphic novel kind of girl, so I can safely say that I had never really focused my attention on the Punisher before this day of TGivies. I can also safely say that I wish I had never focused my attention on the Punisher, oh, how ignorance was bliss. I have just finished reading issue #1 of the Punisher, and I feel like vomiting.

Let me start by saying that the comic sucked ass. All of it sucked ass. The writing style was horrible. Attempting to read this comic proved to be kind of difficult, I guess the writer thought it was cool to put the dialogue in the form of “prison speak.” Or maybe he was drunk, I really don’t know. Either way, I got really tired of reading word clippings and sentences that were hastily thrown together, such as:
“This pig show you how to paint room RED if you don’t turn around slow.” -Big Scary Black Guy

Even when the writing wasn’t chopped up and mutilated, the style of writing still made me want to puke. Every sentence that came from a villain’s mouth was either stupid, or sounded like unsuccessful poetry. For instance, when Jigsaw first makes his appearance, he utters the garbage, “You got somethin’ to say, say it! I’m missin’ General Hospital,”

WAT DA FUQ STAPLE FACE! I thought you were supposed to be a villian, not a housewife with an addiction to crappy television shows.

And don’t get me started on the Punisher himself. What kind of idiot goes around beating up everybody because his family was murdered? I can understand that he wants revenge on the people that were responsible for their deaths, but nooooo, our emo protagonist had to go around giving everybody the iron fist, just because he’s angry. Bruce Wayne lost both of his parents in a shooting as a kid, and you don’t see him parading around like an ominous jerk, beating up random bad guys….Well okay, you do, but at least you can respect Batman. Batman might share some characteristics of being depressed and angry, but at least in the daytime Bruce Wayne is a billionaire philanthropist. What is Frank Castle is the daytime? Why, he’s nothing but an angry, purposeless ape who can only see the world as an animalistic hell hole.

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